Friday, February 10, 2006
Quarter-Life Crisis
My dear ex-roomie is going away to work in Myanmar tmrw. It came as a shock to me, for I have never expected her to take on a job of that nature.
It's never easy to leave a place that you have grown so accustomed to, leaving your loved ones behind, and that sense of familiarity. And in that sense, I admire her courage to do so.
I don't think I am able to leave everything behind and set off for someplace new. Five years ago maybe, but not now.
I used to be able to do things thoughtlessly, in a carefree manner. That was when I was not liable or responsible to anyone, or anything. However, right now I don't think I can think like that anymore.
For one thing, I value my family much much more now. Especially since now I feel a heavy responsibility toward my aging parents. Somehow I feel like I owe them a lot, emotionally and all. When I go overseas, I worry, not for myself, but for them. I worry if they are alright back here, whether they've taken their medicine on time, whether things are all ok here. Everyday as I witness how recklessly my dad drives, I get very worried for him as well. It may be plain paranoia, but I don't want to deal with unexpected happenings, which will leave me helpless emotionally.
To leave a comfort zone is another risk involved. Maybe as age catches up with me, I've lost the spirit of risk and challenge. gosh..what am i talking about!! quarter-life crisis??!
I've got to stop worrying so much and getting overly paranoid. Period.
Dear V, All the best and take care :) ¶ 9:27 pm
It's never easy to leave a place that you have grown so accustomed to, leaving your loved ones behind, and that sense of familiarity. And in that sense, I admire her courage to do so.
I don't think I am able to leave everything behind and set off for someplace new. Five years ago maybe, but not now.
I used to be able to do things thoughtlessly, in a carefree manner. That was when I was not liable or responsible to anyone, or anything. However, right now I don't think I can think like that anymore.
For one thing, I value my family much much more now. Especially since now I feel a heavy responsibility toward my aging parents. Somehow I feel like I owe them a lot, emotionally and all. When I go overseas, I worry, not for myself, but for them. I worry if they are alright back here, whether they've taken their medicine on time, whether things are all ok here. Everyday as I witness how recklessly my dad drives, I get very worried for him as well. It may be plain paranoia, but I don't want to deal with unexpected happenings, which will leave me helpless emotionally.
To leave a comfort zone is another risk involved. Maybe as age catches up with me, I've lost the spirit of risk and challenge. gosh..what am i talking about!! quarter-life crisis??!
I've got to stop worrying so much and getting overly paranoid. Period.
Dear V, All the best and take care :) ¶ 9:27 pm
